Wednesday, April 8, 2015

List: Ten things you should never say to a woman.

We all have pet peeves and little things that annoy us to no end.
It’s totally ok because if you remember this post you already know that I’m full of them!
While they aren’t funny at that moment, afterwards they can make for a great laugh.

That being said, I’d like to point my finger at the male species and call them out.
Men, sometimes you say things that aren’t meant to infuriate us, but activate a bomb.
And, by activate a bomb I mean that you cause us to explode into a fury of unnecessary anger.

In an attempt to save women a sore throat and men a throbbing ear, here’s a danger list.
Please, for the love of God, take this list seriously and avoid using these phrases at all costs!

Ten things you should NEVER say to a woman.

1.  It must be THAT time of the month?
This is another way for a man to shift the blame from himself to your menstrual cycle.
How would he like it if we handed him a tampon every time HE got pissy?  Hmph!

2.  You’re just like you’re mother.
This line is supposed to scare us women into changing our words and actions.
Madre is an independent and smart woman that I’d be proud to take after!

3.  You’re crazy.
Men believe if they manipulate us into thinking we’re crazy, we’ll forget our sanity.
I am certainly NOT crazy.  The only thing making me crazy is you.  So leave.  Now.

4.  Whatever.
Somewhere along the line the male species learned how to use our own word against us.
Did you just whatever me???  Well, whatever yourself and, NO, I don’t take that back.

5.  That’s a woman’s job.
This is a man’s sexist excuse to ignore certain responsibilities and be lazy.
Oh really?  You just irked me right into a two month long “woman’s job” strike.

6.  That’s just how I am.
This is a lame excuse for a man to keep his obnoxious habits and mannerisms.
I like to live in a pink house filled with daisies and glitter.  You don’t like it?  Well, that’s just how I am!!!

7.  Your voice is annoying.
This is the rude way for a man to tell you to be quiet and give him time to cool off.
Seriously?  Then I just won’t talk ever again.  I’m sorry, I can’t answer THAT question with THIS voice.

8.  What do you want me to do about it?
This is another way for a man to say “I’m really not going to do ANYTHING about that”.
Please note that most of the time the only thing we want you to do about it is listen to us vent.

9.  I’m the man here.
Some men feel the need to state the obvious existence of their male bits to overpower women.
I am well aware of your gender.  What exactly is your point with that news worthy headline?

10.  Relax.
Unless the woman is really overreacting, this is one of the male species’ stall tactics.
Relax?  RELAX?  I’ll give you a real reason to tell me to relax!!!

What lines did you learn to avoid saying to women?

17 comments:

  1. Oh yes I love "Relax". One line all men should really stop saying is "You look great for your age". How about trying "You look great" and keeping it at that buddy!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol!! That's horrible. If I didn't have OCD, I'd totally make that number 11 on my list.

      Delete
  2. lol but what if they really are crazy?

    I said "Oh cry me a river" once and got an ear full. Being a smart arse can back fire sometimes hahaha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You SAID that...tisk tisk tisk!!!!! That's a huge no no, no matter how much we are complaining.

      Delete
    2. But it was in a smart arse way. Learned my lesson that day

      Delete
  3. #1 & #3 are the most annoying to me. They're so rude and such write-offs of conversation!!! I honestly can't believe the first one is said as frequently has it is by EVERYONE.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Right??? That one KILLS me. Granted I may have less patience during that time, I am not out with a sword looking for a fight. Hmph

      Delete
    2. lol, exactly. Though I was watching "Sister Wives" and the man, Kody, was saying how it's rough how they are all synced-up and I was thinking... ok, maybe with 4 wives you have a point there... but you signed up for that, lol.

      Delete
  4. “Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.” ― George Carlin

    ReplyDelete
  5. You're a bad mother and Did you get weight, would be the lethal ones....

    ReplyDelete
  6. I've used numbers 4 & 6 before. Lesson learned :P

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yes to all of these - and then relax is the one that gets me every time! xo, Biana - BlovedBoston

    ReplyDelete
  8. Whatever.

    No, just kidding. I can't remember saying any of these,... at least not lately.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Agree with all...one that sets my hair on fire is....
    "You look just fine..." ......Fine ??? FINE ??? Might as well say, "Go change, you look terrible."

    ReplyDelete

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