Friday, June 8, 2012

Challenge: Hipster-ism

Yesterday I told you guys how Tab indirectly challenged me to become a “Hipster”.
I mean, how do you label a girl “trendy” without expecting her to lash back?

 I did the most “un-hipster” thing I could do to prove Tab wrong.
I researched “How to become a Hipster”, stapled my new “guide”, and highlighted the key points.
Talk about what a trendy person would do!  Sigh… 

After all my research and color coordinated highlighting, I realized one thing.
Tab was totally right and I could never, ever become a Hipster.
Hipsters may be unique and trendy, but they are exhausting.
I got tired just reading the rules for joining this social group! 

************************** 

Here are 10 reasons why Jax could not become a Hipster. 

1.  Fashion
Hipsters get their apparel from places like vintage stores, their grandmother’s closets, and independent retailers.
They also like to rock over-sized, plastic glasses to complete the unique look.
Their clothes are typically layered and not matching.
Ok, the fashion thing I could do.  Well, minus the clothes that don’t match.  I mean, why wouldn’t you match?

2.  Lingo
Hipsters need to develop a whole new way of talking.
They use different sayings such as “totally deck”, “don’t be a daisy”, and “I liked them before they were famous”.
I blab way too much to change my lingo now.  I talk exactly how I write in this blog!

3.  Attitude
Hipsters are supposed to have a sarcastic, mellow personality.  They are also known to drop names.
A hipster also has to be able to tone down their humor and giggles.
Ok, I could try as hard as I want, but I’ll never have a mellow personality.  No giggles either?  Not happening… 

4.  Hair & Nails
Hair or Nail salons do not exist in the world of Hipsters.  They don’t believe in getting your hair or nails did.
Just to be clear, that means no hair appointment every 6 weeks.  That also means no UV gel mani/pedi!
Jax does not miss her hair or nail appointments.  That may be a trendy thing to do, but I really don’t care!!

5.  Independent Music & Art
Hipsters only indulge in independent music and art.  They only enjoy things that aren’t mainstream.
They could be a fan of a band one day, and hate them the next simply because the band got some hype.
They also make insulting popular artists a habit.
Where’s the fan loyalty?  When I love an artist it’s usually for life!  I’m also not too good at insulting people! 

6.  Magazines
The only magazines these people read are the ones meant for their community.
No Glamour magazine was the defining factor in my decision.  I mean, a life without Glamour?  Why?! 

7.  Dating
Hipsters tend to only date other hipsters.  They like to stay within their non-mainstream clique.
Just to be clear, that means no sexy professionals on the dating menu.  Don’t even look at the doctors or lawyers!
As if finding a decent guy isn’t hard enough, let’s eliminate the majority of the population.  Lovely… 

8.  Vocabulary
On top of the crazy lingo that these people made up, they also use words that they know nobody will understand.
They’ll go into the dictionary and look up random words to incorporate into their everyday vocab.
At least this enhances their intelligence, but why?  Why would you want to waste time talking if no one can understand you?

9.  Food
Growing your own food and adopting a vegan lifestyle is a key point of becoming a hipster.
If growing your food is impossible, stick to stores like Whole Foods that sell organic, well-seasoned varieties.
Hipsters are also famous for cooking their own gourmet meals based on what food is “hip” at the moment.
I get having “hip” clothes, listening to “hip” music, or even just being “hip”.  But, “hip” food?  No…

10.  Deny Everything
The most important thing about being a hipster, is to deny that you are one.
On top of denying that you are a hipster, you need to make fun of other hipsters for being a hipster.
Let me get this straight.  They go through all this trouble to be a hipster and they can’t even label themselves as one.
That’s just insane. 

************************** 

I will submit to me being “trendy”, congratulate Tab for winning, and continue to admire the hipsters from afar.
Want to make bets that Tab rolls his eyes after finding out all the work I put into this? 

Could you ever become a Hipster?
I mean, don’t be a daisy because it’s totally deck!

80 comments:

  1. Uh? So what's a hipster again? I mean, I know what is not a hipster...me!

    Seems like a strange breed of people...that is if they qualify for being people!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Join the club. That eliminates you and I... LOL Basicially it's just a person that trys really hard to be different and then denies that they try hard to be different. It's very strange.

      ...but they have AWESOME fashion sense. :)

      Delete
  2. LOL I could become a hipster over one of those dumpster diving freegans, but other than that, not bloody likely. Although I can deny quite well and make up many words, but what the strat it is too much work so flibo that.

    And see Tab was right, as was the cat, Paris Hilton has better odds, do I get some points for that? See we were just trying to make you see the light..haha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, hipsters do seem more tame than the freegans. I mean, could you eat thrown out food? Idts... lol Bleh, gag, barf!!

      LOL Deny and make up words? Ok, so you're almost there. hahahahaha

      Psh, telling Tab that he was right!! You can't do that!!! lol Paris Hilton does not have better odds so you get zero points. LOL The light? mhmm

      Delete
    2. LOL nope keep the thrown out food, once it is gone it is gone haha

      Two out of ten isn't bad I suppose, but still I'd prob throw out a hip trying to be that hip..haha

      See you saw the light and came back to reality it which you could not be a hipster. So Tab did his duty and the cat just helped push it along, points all around, except for you, yours goes to Paris Hilton.

      Delete
    3. You gave my points to Paris Hilton???????? You lost points for that!!!!! You can't do that!??!?!?!?!!? lol

      Delete
  3. Ugh! Thank you for listing these points because I really had no idea. No, I could never be a hipster. Way too much effort! I like to wear what I feel like wearing, say what I want, eat what I want without having to grow it... In fact, the superficiality of the whole thing makes me want to puke. What is the point?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No problem, Lady! It's way too much effort to join a group of people that don't believe in being carefree and giggly! Life's to short to be sarcastic and mellow. LOL Then, in the end, you can't even call yourself a hipster? Sh*t...if I did all that I'm going to post a billboard saying "I'M OFFICIALLY A HIPSTER!!!" lol

      Delete
    2. Lol! You're a nut! But yes, definitely a billboard at least lol.

      I watched My Best Friend's Girl today and it was fun! Especially when he dropped his pants for the mom lol....

      Delete
    3. A billboard will do :) I mean, that is a lot of work and a lot of work deserves recognition! lol

      Ohh, glad you liked it!! That movie cracks me up!! My favorite part is when he shaves his eyebrows off. I pee everytime!! hahahaha

      Delete
  4. There's nothing like becoming a certain age and not worrying about the perceptions of others.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, Bama. What age is that??? ;)

      Delete
    2. You will know when you come to it. It's different for different people. xo

      Delete
    3. I agree Bama:) Is absolutely nice Fax really dont worry about perceptions of others!LOL

      Delete
    4. Thanks, Bama! It will be soon! At least I realized that I shouldn't change who I am based on a label ;)

      Thanks, Gloria! I won't. I'll be me :)

      Delete
  5. I can't say anything about hipster because it is the freedom of the individual..
    i m not hipster..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, it's the freedom of the individual. I still enjoy going to watch them and admiring their rocking fashion sense from afar, but I could never join their clique.

      Not a hipster? That's ok! How would you classify yourself then?

      Delete
    2. i don t like hipsters... i m an ordinary man

      Delete
    3. Ordinary man? Well, that works too! :)

      Delete
  6. AMEN BAMATRAV!!!!!!!!!! Rock who you are without labels.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol!! No labels? That exists???

      Delete
  7. "don't be a daisy" oh, I know exactly on whom I will use that one :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahahaha Can't wait to see you use it ;) That should be a fun time!

      Delete
  8. Wow! That sounds like way too much work!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It really is...and for what? Just to try and be different for the sake of being different and then denying it?? I don't get it!!!

      Delete
  9. I could never grow my own food. My backyard is suited for growing weeds and crabgrass, but when it comes to real plants it never produces results.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Weeds? Well, some people eat weeds. It makes for a good salad ;)

      Delete
  10. Oh weird! I thought it was just a look. Who knew there were rules! Crazy!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are rules and they are insane!!! lol

      Delete
  11. I'm glad to hear you decided against being a hipster and decided to stay awesome! Really though who could eat "hip" food. No, just no.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Matt! Yes, I decided to keep my own unique awesomeness and not join the hipsters. LOL Hip food? Um, yea, bout that... lol

      Delete
  12. Brilliant Jax. And they way you had listed, perfect. This should be printed in large numbers and posted around all the schools and colleges for all those wannabe hipsters.
    No.9 is you right?
    I used to do that No.10,I was in denial that I wasnt a nerd, but looks like I can pass for textbook definition of nerd. Better be nerd than a hipster if you ask me.
    Hipsters and Doctors - END OF THE WORLD.
    When I had to dress up in formal attire alltime, I wasnt big fan of that later when they allowed us to wear casuals - I dont like to dress casually to work. I prefer to dress up as Hilary Clinton than Angelina Jolie for that matter.

    You made a good choice by not trying to mimic a hipster.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Cap!! Glad that you liked it!!

      Want to start printing it and posting it? Let's do it!! Maybe we can write it off as some charity event. I mean, it was save a lot of children many hours of nonsense. LOL

      LOL @ Hipsters and drs being the end of the world! Yes, that just would not do. Hipsters only dates hipsters so they can reproduce little hipsters. But, my thing is, if a hipster can't say that they are a hipster...how do they know they are dating another hipster??? LOL

      Delete
  13. This is way to complicated for me. And to not be able to cover up my gray hair? No way! Not even an option! Besides, I like being Random =)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, complicated it definitely is!!!! You can cover up your greys...you just need to do it on your own. LOL

      Amen to being random!

      Delete
  14. Jax, being a hipster is REALLY simple. You just name drop as many obscure artists, bands, writers you can muster. THEN if someone has heard of them also, you talk about how you were in to them YEARS before anyone else knew who they were. Seriously, you do that and you can wear whatever you want. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL I don't think that I could do that..ever. I don't name drop! I'll only mention a band or artist because I really do love their music and probably will for life. I can't stop liking a certain music simply because they are becoming popular. That's crazy!

      Delete
  15. Ha, you're hilarious. I totally don't cut my hair or do my nails but I am far from hipster

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, at least that rule won't be that hard for you ;) lol

      Delete
  16. Jax, you are so much fun! I wish I would've known you when I was your age. I wouldn't change a thing about yourself. You keep bringing me back to your blog and I may be old enough to be your mom. (In my head, I'm still around 25ish.)
    And as much as I love some of the hipsters, I could never pull of those clothes or take the time to shop for them. That is just too much work!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aw, thanks girl!! So glad that I can take you back :)

      Exactly! I love to watch them for inspiration fashion wise, but to do all that? Um, no. It was exhausting just reading up on it let alone actually doing it!!

      Have a great weekend! xo

      Delete
  17. Oh gosh. That's a lot of rules. I don't think I could ever do it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes they are. But are they worth it?? lol

      Delete
  18. i was told once that i would never be able to fully understand the movie Where The Wild Things Are because i wasn't a Brooklyn hipster...R.I.P. Maurice Sendak

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe I should go to Brooklyn next weekend then so I could check them out ;)

      Ok, or maybe I should watch the movie first. lol

      Delete
  19. I think there are people who are hip and then there are people who follow rules to be hip and they're just...not haha You're obvs much better off as you are. And really? Not getting hair and nails did? Really?!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Exactly!!!!! You said it perfectly!!!!

      Ohh, my nails need to get did... ;) hahahaha

      Delete
  20. Yeah, no. I couldn't be a hipster, not now not never ;) Hope you have a great weekend, and I'm glad you enjoyed the Sole Men Q&A

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks girl, you do the same!!

      Delete
  21. Hilarious. Just read the previous post too. Who would want to be a silly hipster anyway? You are much better off being trendy!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, trendy is where I will stay. I didn't even know I was trendy until someone told me that. I mean, I am just me. lol!!! But, the hipsters are still fun to watch. ;)

      Delete
  22. You always make me laugh!:) LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww, glad I could make you laugh!!! xo

      Delete
  23. Nope. I don't match a single one of those.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me either, so don't feel bad ;)

      Delete
  24. there's a lingo? crap, i'm out on that alone. had no idea what totally deck meant.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes!! There is a lingo and it's completely redonkulous. LOL

      Delete
  25. I've come to the sad realisation that I could be a hipster... is there anything I can take? Or maybe a cream...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A cream? A hipster cream? Hmmm, well cream is like moisturizing which is like grooming and hipsters don't do that. I'll have to look into it! lol

      Delete
  26. I like to think I could go hipster for a week if I wanted to, but the trouble is I really don't want to. If someone offers me a large amount of money I'll consider it...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. For a week? Only a week? LOL To get large sums of money you may be required to rock the style for a little long than that ;) lol

      Delete
  27. Lol...I could never be a hipster. I'm not cool enough, or current enough, and there's no way I could follow all those rules. I applaud you for trying/researching though.

    Tab should just be thankful that you're you. There's only one rule for being Jax: Jax rules. haha :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All those rules are ridiculous! You're totally cool enough to be a hipster. In fact, you're too cool to be a hipster :) lol

      Aww, I like that! Can't wait to pass that message along to Tab.

      Delete
  28. Haha. You've really got it all analyzed! I think a lot of bloggers are hipsters, actually. But perhaps not your readers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently my readers are anti-hipsters. LOL Who knew?

      Delete
  29. I would be a hipster, but its waaay too popular now

    P.s. Nutella

    p.p.s :p

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @Rusty...Ironic, ain't it? I mean, part of being a hipster is that they hate "main stream" and "popularity". Maybe you avoiding being a hipster b/c it's too popular actually makes you a hipster!!! Hmmm, I'll ponder that and get back to you ;)

      Delete
    2. P.S. Totally peanut butter!!!! lol

      Delete
  30. It's terrible, I think I'm partially hipster... ><

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't be ashamed, be proud!!!! You guys got some rocking style ;)

      Delete
  31. I think I'd rather shoot myself in the foot than become a hipster. I can't stand them.

    ReplyDelete
  32. and this is why i adore you! i feel very comfortable saying that I live in the hipster capitol of North America and I while I do have some hipster friends... i have zero interest in joining their group. basically, basing what you like based off what is 'cool' within your group is JUST as pathetic of liking something just bc it's "mainstream'. they are relaly diluted sometimes.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Ha, i don't think we have hipsters in England, or maybe we do and im too uncool to spot them. Id love to grow my own food though, but it would mean defeating all the cats that turn Sherlock Holmes when you put anything in the ground lol.
    I read hipsters are disliked because they are usually well off, and dress as though they have no money, buying cheap ect.
    And the cliches that are very real for some they make fun of by dressing ironically like pabst beer, isn't that like a working class beer. Kind of like someone dressing as a 'farm worker' or something for a fancy dress. I did see Henry Rollins meet some hipsters once and they were pretty arrogant, they lazed around in a bar and made fun of his work, they just seemed trust fundy.
    I don't think it can be blamed on disillusion because of society, being nasty is being nasty, its pretty simple not to do it.
    I think however you dress, so long as your a good person and you don't harm others , then who cares?

    The article made me laugh thought, you have a great sense of humour in your posts.

    ReplyDelete
  34. ok i just read it... i'm not qualified hahahahahaha I guess its not easy to be part of that hipster group hehehe lol.

    ReplyDelete
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