Monday, January 9, 2012

Playas Gonna Playy

Happy Monday everyone!!  I made last night's post before the big Broncos verses the Steelers game.  Did anyone watch it??  Holy crap, what a game!!!  The really sexy talented Tebow wowed everyone by leading his team to a well deserved victory in overtime against the Steelers.  Did you Tebow?  This Pats fan instantly got down on one knee screaming "Tebow timeee!!".  That relgious good boy had a hell of a run this season!  Too bad my Patriots are going to destroy him this week.  Too all the haters bashing him because of a cold sore, go away!!  He said he gives thanks to God...no one ever said that he doesn't lip lock.  See Tebow, I got ya back ;)

Oh. My. God.  You're welcome ladies ;)
Now that we had or hot NFL player stare down, onto the real post!  This weekend, during my Saturday ritual (For those of you who are new, every Saturday I go to TheViking's dry cleaners to do my laundry and man shop.  Don't judge!), I ran into the EggMan!!!  Remember him?  He's the older guy that I was dating.  I told you guys all about it here.  He flinched in shock at the sight of me.  Then he nervously went on to explain that he didn't realize I would be there since my bug wasn't in the parking lot.  Long story short, he had another woman in the car who was his long time girlfriend.  I only went out with the guy a few times, so I really didn't care.  What bothered me was, this guy was playing that poor girl sitting in the car.  

Ok, gentlemen, I'm going to give it to you straight.  I get that many men feel the need to be a "playa", but you're probably not one.  Get over it!  Peaches has it right when she says "Play or get played"!  Sad that women are outplaying the men these days.  Sigh...  I hate men that play games simply because I don't have time for it.  But if you're going to do it, do it right!  Let me teach you...

1.  Tassles.  You can't be a player and wear those little tassels on your loafers.  It just doesn't work.  Yes, I'm looking at you EggMan.

2.  Pictures.  Just because you can get a group of drunk girls to take a picture with you, doesn't make you a player.  

3.  Liar.  This is the wannabe player that sat home all night and lied about it.  As if we're dumb enough to believe that the "This isn't where I parked my car" line actually led to a random menage a trois in a hot tub.

4.  Guido.  Just because you rock a blow out, go tanning, and pluck your eye brows in a manly way, doesn't mean that you're a player.  Oh, and for the record, there is nothing manly about a guy who obviously gets their brows did.  No girl wants to get showed up by their date's perfectly sculpted man-brows!!

5.  Cougar.  Yes, you many have slept with that ancient cougar in the parking lot of a club, but no, you are not a player.  And may I suggest you get tested because I highly doubt you were her one and only.

6.  Train Wreck.  This is to the guy who decides to ruin his perfect relationship by proving to the boys he hasn't lost "it".  You're not a player.  You're just a dumb boy that is going to be begging for his girl back in less than a week.  My girlfriend, DramaQueen, can tell you about this one!!  3 years later, and he's still begging for her back.  Pathetic!

7.  Rich.  Just because you have a wad of money in your pocket, doesn't make you a player.  You may be able to buy a few girls, but in the end, they're playing you and your bank account.  

8.  Facebook.  So, you got about 2,000 girls to hit accept on Facebook.  Congratulations, playaa!  You now have a group of strangers viewing your personal page.

9.  Pinky Ring.  For the love of God, take it off!!!!  Real players don't wear pinky rings.  I promise!

10. Suck Up.  Sure us women like compliments, but when you dump them on us faster than green grass goes through a goose, we can see right through you!  We can sniff the player out of any brown nosing fool.

The truth is, the wanna be players are the ones that you can call out.  The wannabes make it so obvious that it's practically written on their foreheads.  The real players are the ones that you will never see coming.  A true player would not want their secrets to come out and they certainly won't brag about.  

Do you have any words of wisdom for the wannabe playas out there??

-Jax

30 comments:

  1. I rather just through the damn games out the window, along with a the nuts that play them. But yeah many are sooo obvious, whether male or female. It usually stems from a lack of brain cells or a want to be an attention whore. WOW I have 2000 facebook friends, whoopdi friggin doo, you prob talk to what? 5 of them...lol

    And yeah the drunk pictures with a group of girls are easy to get.

    The best way to be a true player is not to play, than they'll never see you coming.

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  2. Men wear pinky rings? No. no. no. I refuse to believe in a world where this happens...

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  3. I saw that game! Everyone was pulling for the Steelers and said Tebow was going down. I told them, you better not underestimate Tebow! LOL I know some nice betting money was lost with that one. HAHAHA Girl you have the fake playa's down to a tee. HAHAHA I've come across many with those pinky rings. ewwwww! LOL

    http://averysweetblog.com/

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  4. Avoid the pinky rings at all costs.

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  5. nice blog you got here and amusing post!

    Weird Interesting News
    Following!

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  6. Yay for Tebow! My Dad (from Denver) is loving this season so much, it's pretty incredible and makes me happy.

    Um this is really funny - that poor girl who was in the car,ugh. What a pain. Famous last words but my boyfriend is not a player at all and I love that, he's just so gosh darn trustworthy. but I have dated all of those tools above before so I definitely feel you (besides the pinky ring, I probably wouldn't notice that :). The FB one is the worse.. especially because they always end up being like club promoters (gag)

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  7. Haha I completely agree with the man-brow. I dated this guy before my now husband and he had the most amazing eye brows... We started going to the same asian lady.. haha weird right?

    I LOVE TEBOW

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  8. Reading this makes me so glad I'm married. Pinky rings? Men who pluck their eyebrows? Yuck. What happened to being a REAL man with no pretentiousness? To being a gentleman without automatically expecting something in return?

    Like I said, glad I'm married. This new world of dating would probably turn me lesbian.

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  9. Tebow is SOOOOO awesome! Whoot Whoot!!!

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  10. that game was amazing. i think i was in shock for about 5 minutes after it because i couldn't believe what just happened!

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  11. ewww.... pinky rings!

    anyways lol the eggman. ugh god he just sounds like a total creeper all around! that poor woman has no idea what she is dealing with! lmao and the tassles?? wtf!?

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  12. Hilarious post! My husband always comments when Tebow plays-he's had a great season!

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  13. To be honest, Jesus Tebow kind of freaks me out. Okay, freaks me out a lot. But we can agree to disagree!

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  14. Ok I just have to say the neck on that guy is unreal! I'm pretty sure it's thicker than my thigh. WOW.
    As for the player thing... They drive me nuts. I'm leaving that one alone.

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  15. Sorry but I am SO over football. Bring on baseball!

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  16. It´s great to see your creativity in this blog.

    http://paquetevistasbien.blogspot.com

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  17. The real players are the ones that you will never see coming. EXACTLY! Then you get burned. Ps- I hope the Pats DESTROY Denver. I'm so sick of them and Tebow and hearing about Tebow. Go Tom!

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  18. i'm still shocked at that game. tebow is a fun guy to follow. i was rooting for the steelers becuz i don't think the broncos have a chance to beat your pats, but i also couldn't help rooting for tebow becuz he is so undermanned in terms of skills. now wait, i'm not hating. honest:) he is an incredible team leader, that's for sure. i just don't know how he beat the steelers. i will be rooting for him while he gets destroyed by the pats. the ravens will have to beat the pats, i guess:)

    the women players are the ones to watch out for. they can screw up your life for years. maybe guys can do that too, but guys are dumber than women in general and a perfect player of a woman is a weapon i want no part of. just saying. i'm not saying you are one. i'm just saying:)

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  19. I am so with you on the eyebrow thing. I don't mind if a guy cleans them up a bit with tweezers, but for the love of GOD if they are prettier than mine, we're gonna have a problem.

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  20. Do younger men wear pinky rings? I associate it with my older Italian relatives. But yeah, they need to cut that out, regardless of age,

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