Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Whooping Cough & Voice Control

Did you ever hear of the Whooping Cough?  It is also known as Pertussis.  If not, let me give you the basic facts.  It could be a deadly disease and apparently it's ancient.  According to today's Newsday, it hasn't hit New York since 1999.  There have been 216 reported cases thus far and at least 1 death.  Early symptons of this disease are very similiar to the common cold, but as the illness lingers you may develop coughing fits followed by a high pitched "whoop!".  As serious as this is, I can't help but picture someone plagued with this disease.  "cough, cough, cough, WOOP!, cough cough"  Fun Fact:  I am an unofficial hypocondriac.  or maybe just a germophobe.  Ever since my father informed me about this disease a few days ago, I have been hacking up a lung.  While there have been no "whoops", I still fear that I have contracted Pertusis.  knock on wood!

What does Dr. Fun perscribe during this tramatizing time?  Well, onions of course!!  It turns out that if you sleep with an onion in your room or near your bed, that lovely little vegetable will suck up all the nasty germs and coodies lurking around.  This not only helps your immune system, but it helps stop you from contracting other ailments.  I am going to sleep the entire Winter with a bowl of onions on my night stand.  Let's see if I can make it without contracting one cold!

...and now for the REAL question asked to me by my darling friend, Peaches.
Should I get the iPhone?
I vote no.

There are several reasons why I refuse to join the cult like phenonomen known as the iPhone.  The first reason is because this phone severlely limits an individual's creativity.  Their phone cases are pretty standard, the ringtones are standard, and the customization features are very limited.  This is a phone that YOU need to mold to.  A phone should mold to you.  Think about it.  You are in an elevator and an iphone starts ringing.  How many people in the elevator look down and check their phones?  Well, not LMF...I don't look down unless I hear Rihanna singing "california kingg bedddd".  Sigh...

While those reasons should be enough to deter anyone from purchasing such a pricey cellie just to join the iPhone club, I have more.  No, I'm not referring to the iPhone's HORRIBLE speaker phone.  No, I'm not referring to the iPhone's failed attempt at forcing you to join a contract with at&t Verizon customers are also graced with it's presence now.  No, I'm not even referring to the disgusting little fingerprints that mark the screen of each iphone.  Are you taking notes?? I am referring to the new feature that the iPhone is promoting.  Voice control.  You can now talk into the phone and your cellie will magically fill out the text message for you.  Is this a perk to attract the lazy man, or is it another feeble attempt to control what the public texts to their contacts?! hmmm...

Well, let me tell you about my experience with voice control.  Biff has this feature and he recently sent me a text message saying "Please excuse my side boob".  Who the hell knows what it was REALLY supposed to say?!  And who cares?!  I got a message about a side boob.  hahaha

What do you think about the iPhone?
I vote that the case it comes in should read "Bow down minions!!"
-LMF

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Oo la la, Secret Rendezvous

Good morning Sunshines :) 
I have a confession!

Despite my hectic schedule of working over 50 hours a week, college, and rekindling things with MrBikeRide, I've been partaking in a hushed adventure.  For the past three weeks I have been seeing an older manOk, so he's only 31.  But he's still 8 years my elder.  First: let me extend my apologies for keeping such a juicy secret to myself.  Now let me explain...

I met him during my usual Saturday ritual.  For those of you that are new, every Saturday morning I hang out at my father's dry cleaners and guy shop for sexy professionals dropping off nice suits!  TheStrong walked in and dropped off a hefty load of dry cleaning.  He isn't my usual type, but he has an attractive vibe and a sophistacted demenour.  TheStrong was easy to talk to and I could quickly tell that he was a gentleman.  Pushing the large age difference to the side, I agreed to meet him that night for our first date.  Hey, couldn't hurt to try...

Tassles:  I met him at a local, high-end bar.  He mentioned that he was taking the train because "you could never be too careful".  Red Flag:  Was he extremely paranoid or a drunk?  After I spotted him at the far end of the bar sipping some sort of fancy cinnamon rimmed beer, I decided to do a quick up/down check out to decipher whether I should stay or run.  He was wearing a very nice outfit.  An expensive brand name shirt and freshly creased slacks.  I continued to look down and that's when I saw them.  He was wearing fancy old man loafers with tassles.  Tassles!!!!  You know, the little broom like things attached to your shoe that desperately try to sweep the floor as you walk.  Sigh...  His endearing smile, friendly aura, and my father's approval made me stay.

Turns out he was a very nice guy.  He was as interesting to listen to as he was interested in listening to me.  I had a really nice night.  We ran into a few of his friends, and they too, were very nice.  They made me feel like part of the group.  I was glad that I went out and tried something new.

Eggs:  Towards the end of our date, TheStrong looked at me and blurted out "What is your morning routine like?"  Unsure how to answer this question, I began rambling off everything that I do.  Shower, brush my teeth, make hard boiled eggs...  He then looked at me like a little kid excited over something amazing.  "You eat hard boiled eggs every morning?!  Me too!!!"  The next half hour was spent with him explaining his "secret recipe".  I wasn't aware that there was a recipe for such a thing!  I chalked it off to a bad reaction to his fancy beer and thought nothing more of it. 

The next morning or 6 hours later I received a text message from TheStrong with his "secret recipe" written out in detail. After a simple response of "ok", he came back with a novel explaining how "hard boiled eggs has become an art form" to him and how me making them was a "great visual".  For the next two weeks he asked me EVERY single day how my eggs were and if I used his recipe.  One day I threw him for a loop and told him I boiled them in salt water.  I thought he was going to have a coronary.  I learned many egg tips such as "eggs near their expiration date work best" and "a simple roll with the right amount of pressure will rid the egg of its shell".  On our second date he must've considered me graduated from TheStrong Egg Academy because he diverged more complicated egg secrets.  For the love of God, the man was obsessed with hard boiling eggs.

All hail the holy egg!!!!
While I was attracted to his maturity, established-ness (he already owned a house, a condo, and a summer home), and his chivraly his egg obsessing, tassle wearing self turned me off.

What was your experience with an older man or woman?

-LMF

Monday, November 28, 2011

Feel the burn!!!

Happy Monday everyone!!  How was your holiday and your long weekend?  Mine was great!!  It was very busy and definitely not boring.  How about them Patriots?  Again they creamed their way to yet another win.  Brady is beyond godly in a fairy-ish way.  Gronk stole all of my man's hype again by scoring another touch down.  That's ok because Brady, Welker, and Green-Ellis brought me a dominating fantasy team this week.  Since I didn't get enough Hernandez action on TV today, here's a cute video of Aaron being interviewed about his knee injury earlier in the season.  Don't judge...We all have our weaker points.  Conversing just isn't his strong point.  He's still beautiful though.  Sigh...




So I have been officially on an online dating website for 24 hours.  I've received 65 messages and have gotten 280 views.  Overwhelming much?  Out of all those people, I only responded to about 3 of them.  I have gotten every pick up line, cheesy comment, and dirty saying thrown at me all day long.  One guy awarded me with the "best profile on the website".  Then he told me to "come and collect my award".  Umm, no thank you.  One question has been asked several times and got me thinking.  How do you keep your body so fit?  While fit is a huge overstatement, I do have a slim build and maintain a healthy lifestyle .  It takes a lot of work, but I developed a regiment that is easily incorporated into my already busy schedule.

I know that I'm always looking for great tips (thank you Glamour magazine!), so here are a few that I follow religiously.

1.  Stretch.  I had a spinal fusion surgery 2 years ago.  Ever since then, I start every morning by stretching out every single muscle in my entire body.  It not only helps me gain flexibility but it wakes me up.  I think this helps start your metabolism in the morning.  But don't quote me on that....I'm Ms. Fun not Dr. Fun!


2.  Breakfast.  I do not leave the house until I eat my hard boiled egg and drink my coffee.  Two hours later, around 10am, I eat a fruit filled cereal bar.  This keeps me full all day long and stops me from snacking.  The fact that I don't buy snacks might help that also, but you get my point...


3.  Water Bottle Work Out.  Every morning I pack a water bottle for the day.  While preparing this, I do my arm work out.  I punch to the front 20x per arm.  Then I punch to the side 20x per arm.  After that I hold my arms out with the water bottles and spin my hands in little circles for 5 minutes each arm.  I think Michelle Obama or someone famous does this.  I mean, I got it from somewhere...


4.  Extra Walking.  Park at the end of the parking lot and walk.  Take the stairs instead of the elevator.  I have a fear of elevators so that helps me keep up with that one!  Walk around the mall and window shop.  Power walk to a near by shopping center.  Walk around the building a few times during your lunch break.  Just walk, walk, walk!

5.  Bathroom Squats.  This is an embarrassing confession.  Lucky I love you guys...  Every time I go to tinkle, I do 10-15 squats over the toilet bowl.  Holding yourself up in that position is the perfect way to work out your quads.  I swear by this one!  Some of my friends even started doing it!!

6.  Develop OCD.  Vacuuming is a great way to lose calories!  I vacuum, dust, scrub, bleach, and clean during any free minute that I have.  This not only keeps my apartment and cubicle real clean, but it helps burn off a lot of calories.  Forget the car wash, and do it yourself!  These are all great forms of exercise!  See, OCD is good for something!


7.  Rabbit Diet.  Being a vegetarian, I eat like a rabbit.  Other than my eggs and cereal bars, the rest of my day is filled with delicious salads, candied nuts, sauteed vegetables, and quiches.  I seriously eat like a rabbit.  It works.  Your new motto should be "would a rabbit eat that?"


8.  Laugh.  Word is laughing burns off a lot of calories.  Laughing might develop wrinkles on your face, but it keeps you healthy!  I have a daily case of the giggles.  Anyone that knows me can tell you that I crack up over the dumbest things.  Laughing helps keep you in shape and gives off a contagious state of happiness.


What are your secret stay fit and healthy tips?
-LMF

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Going Fishing!

How was everyone's Black Friday?  Buy anything good at a great price?  Get all your holiday shopping done?  Hopefully you didn't get trampled during your shopping endeavors.  That's not sarcastic!  That's my biggest Black Friday fear!  I chose to spend my Black Friday watching Iron Man with MrBikeRide and then going to see Happy Feet with Biff.  Have I mentioned that I love my best friend?  Poor guy gets dragged to the worst places!  Happy Feet ended up being a great movie!  I haven't laughed that hard in a while.  Tonight Biff and I will be going to some trashy club to watch people perform some rap song on stage.  Like I said, the worst places.  He says that I owe him a kidney for escorting me tonight!


One of my girlfriends decided to join an online dating website called Plenty of Fish.  She's found a few decent men on there.  In fact, she has currently been seeing someone that she met on the website.  I've personally stayed away from online dating because I had a negative view on it.  Think about it!  I meet enough crazies face to face.  Why would I open doors for a whole new level of crazy?  Well, today while watching 27 Dresses I decided that it was time for me to go fishing also!  I signed up for the website and within 30 seconds I received about 5 messages.  Creepy!!  After filtering through a few dozen freak shows looking for a booty call, I found 2 or 3 men that were worth messaging back.

How do you filter out men worth your time through the internet?  Well, I guess Ms. Fun is about to find out!  I am trying to be open minded.  Normally I date gorgeous men of little substance.  This method has not been going so well for me.  While this experience is more of a social experiment than a dedication, I vow to be more open minded.  I just messaged a guy back with glasses!  As shallow as that sounds, that's a huge improvement for me!  Don't judge...  The men that I agree to go out with usually are beautiful to look at but dumb as bricks.  I'm 23 and it's time to start dating a man with a resume.

What are your experiences with online dating?

Oh...before I start to get ready for tonight (and by get ready I mean try on every article of clothing in my closet), here are the answers to the abs.

1.  Britney Spears
2.  Leonardo DiCaprio
3.  Beyonce
4.  DJ Pauly D

-LMF

Friday, November 25, 2011

Thank You Overdose

Good afternoon Sunshiness!!  I hope you all had a wonderful holiday or Thursday if you don't celebrate filled with plenty of food, family, and friends.  Mine was amazing!!  All the food I cooked was a hit.  My grandmother outdone herself once again with a 4 course meal.  Yum!  My GodSon was beyond precious and the highlight of my evening.  Oh!  Brother and Biff took me to see Immortals yet again.  Henry Cavill was also Yum! 

While I gave and received my fair share of "Thanks you"s, I have one more to say.  Last time for a while, I promise!!  I'm OD on them too.  lol  The lovely Rakhshan over at Rakhshan's Blog awarded me with the Versatile Blogger Award, so I am awarding her with a giant Thank you!



The rules of this award demand 7 random facts about me.  That should be easy enough, as you know that I am full of those!


1.  I love reptiles.  I've had an iguana, 3 snakes, and a gecko.
2.  My favorite color is yellow, but my favorite colors to wear are pink and purple.
3.  I get strange cravings for sushi that usually send me on a 2 week binge.  
4.  The Foldgers commercial with the brother and sister reuniting over a cup of coffee makes me TEAR every single time.  Sigh...
5.  My goal in life is to watch every single movie Robert Downey Jr. was ever in.
6.  I sleep with a Britney Spears poster hung on my ceiling above my bed.
7.  I have a fear of taking things out of the bottom of a vending machine.  Poor Biff got that job all throughout high school.  If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have gotten my daily Snapple.

Well now that you all know just a little bit more about me and since I'm on a holiday, I am going to leave you all with a game that we played last week.  Let's see if you guys could guess these abs!  Good luck :
Hint:  This is my girl crush!!  Oops...

Hint:  He used to be the King of the World!
Hint:  Someone finally put a ring on it!
Hint:  As if the horrible tan isn't hint enough....
-LMF

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Thank ya, Thank ya.

Happy Thanksgiving Eve everyone.  What do you mean that’s not a real holiday?  It’s the biggest party scene of the year on Long Island!  How will you all be spending your Thanksgiving Eve?  I am skipping playtime this year.  The clubs and bars are always so packed that you could barely move, let alone breathe.  My Thanksgiving Eve will be spent with a Robert Downey Jr. movie playing in the background, a nice bottle of red wine, and the aroma of a cooking feast.  To make the homemade cranberry sauce, or to not make it.  That is the question…

In lieu of tomorrow's grand holiday, I would like to list a few things that I am eternally grateful for.  After all, "thanks" is the guest of honor and the purpose of our celebration.   I would like to start by saying that I am grateful for all the gifts that the universe has graced me with, even the tiny ones that we take advantage of every day.  I am grateful for every last person that ever stumbled into or across my life.  Yes, even you grumpy man that fought with me over a parking spot today in Wholefoods...

1.  My Family:  For all the support and love that you guys give me on a daily basis, thank you.  My friends are also part of my family. So to all of you crazy people that deal with an even crazier me, I love you and I am so grateful that you not only exist, but you love me back!

2.  The Hard Times:  To all those hard times that the universe dished out to me, thank you!  You not only made me stronger, but you made me realize that I need to stop and appreciate all the little things.  You also taught me that no matter how bad a situation is, there is always someone who has it worse.  So thank you universe for making the bad times, not all that bad.

3.  My God Son:  To my GodSon that brings more joy to my life than he will ever know, thank you!  You keep me grounded and make me realize that there is always something to work harder for.  If I could give you the world baby boy, I would.  So thank you Mr. Cheese for making my family just that much stronger and giving me more reason to settle down.

Ok, enough of the sentimental mumbo jumbo.  I hate feeling all gooey inside and this post pushed my mushiness level to an all time high.  Bleh...

4.  Glamour Magazine:  If you only knew how many times a day I start a sentence with "Glamour says..".
5.  Wine:  You relax me when noone or nothing else can.
6.  The Love Bug:  You make sitting in traffic for hours, car accidents, and getting lost just a little better.
7. My OB Professor:  You are the only teacher to ever let me take a make up exam for a make up.
8.  Honey:  The tsp I consume of you every day in my tea not only adds sweetness, but keep my throat moist.
9.  Ian Somerhalder & Chris Zylka:  For making Thursday nights bearable.
10.  Hot Tools Hair Straightener:  For letting me look in the mirror without wincing at my fro.
11.  NE Patriots:  You boys give me something to root for and rarley let me down. Yes, Aaron, that means you too!
12.  My Job:  Without you I would not be able to pay rent every month or feed myself.
13.  Online Banking:  For saving me the hassle of having to actually balance out my check book.
14.  Bob-O-Pedic:  You don't know the wonders you did for my back!  I haven't been in pain since I got you.
15.  All of YOU:  For all the smiles you guys give me.  ...and trust me, there's a lot of those!

The fact that you are even sitting with sort of electronic device means that you were blessed with several things most of the world wasn't.  If you aren't in a position to help out those who are less fortunate, at least stop and take a moment to be grateful for all the blessings your life.  So, tell me, What are you thankful for?

-LMF 

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Feast On That!

What's good homies??  Yea, I had enough of the gangsta talk too.  lol!  Normally i wouldn't bore you guys with football talk on a Tuesday, but last night's game was so impressive that I need to give my boys a little shout out.  This win domination consisted of 3 interceptions (...take that haters on NE's defense!), a really awkward run by Brady where he gained about 8 yards only to head butt himself into the dirt, AND a 72 yard touch down on a punt return!!!  We forgive you Aaron baby for messing up a few times last night.  That Gronk is always trying to show you up!  7-3!!!


Womp, womp, womppp <3
With Thanksgiving lurking around the corner, I thought it might be fun to share one of my favorite recipes for gobble gobble day!  As you all know, I'm a bi-annual vegetarian that eats fish.  Every year you don't eat meat you save 50 animals.  So every other year I conduct my annual meat free cleanse!  After my family's huge Italiano dinner that consists of antipasto, gabinadina, and lasagna, we indulge in an American 3rd course.  This is when my Nanny brings out the turkey, the ham, fried cauliflower, artichoke hearts, sweet potato casserole, and my favorite the stuffing.  Unfortunately, vegetarians can't eat stuffing because it absorbs all the damn turkey juice.  No worries, because Ms. Fun has a great substitute!  Consider yourselves privileged because below I am going to share with you all my cheaters version of vegetarian stuffing!  Bono appetit!

1 Stick Unsalted Butter
1-1/2 Cups Celery  <--Diced!
1 Large Yellow Onion <--Diced!
3 Large Green Apples <-- Peeled, Cored, & Diced!
1 Tsp Ground Nutmeg
1/2 Tsp Salt
1/2 Ground Black Pepper
1 Tbsp Sage
1/4 Tsp Cinnamon
1 Tsp Thyme
1 Cup Nuts <-- Chopped! (I prefer pecans, but feel free to go crazy.)
1/2 Cup Dried Cranberries
16 oz Bag Herbed Stuffing Bread
28 oz Vegetable Broth

Melt the butter in a large pan.  Add the onions and celery.  Saute for about 8-10 minutes.  I love the smell of browning onions.  Yum!  In a large bowl, combine all ingredients except for the broth.  Mix really well!!  Add vegetable broth and stir until the bread is evening moistened.  Transfer your mixture into your baking dish and bake for 35 minutes at 350 degrees.  You're welcome!  It's so delicious that I'll give it the LMF seal of approval.  :)

My contribution to Thanksgiving this year will be the vegetarian stuffing, brussel sprouts, and homemade pumpkin bread.  What will you be making?

-LMF

Monday, November 21, 2011

Wad Up Ganstaa?!

Happy Monday everyone!!  I say that in the cheeriest, brightest voice that my vocal chords will allow me to use.  I got great news on a test result I was waiting for, my nails are a fun bubble gum pink (It's funny how a cute nail polish color makes the work day just that much better!), and the NE Patriots are playing tonight.  Tis a pretty good day thus far in the life of Ms. Fun.  How is your day going?
Good luck tonight boys!! Somehow my man, Aaron Hernandez, manages to rock the hobo look, take out the trash, AND still look pretty damn fly!  ;)

My hang out time with SmoothTalker and her crew last night made me realize how much I am slacking in my gangsta talk.  Now, don't get me wrong... I still have the Urban Dictionary app set on the home page of my cellie (Fo Sho!), but conversing with that group reminded me of when my cousin and I would chill.  I used to have to call my friend to translate some of her gangsta speak.  (Half the time I wasn't sure if she was insulting me or giving me a compliment!)  In the words of SmoothTalker, Are y'all down wid it?  Hmm, let's see!

1.  Math.  The day that I met Stretch, we chilled and talked for a little bit.  We immediately clicked!  He was into me and I was feeling him.  After a good conversation, he asked me "Was yo' math?".  After a few "excuse me"s and a "I'm already done with my math class", I learned the true meaning of this question.  He was asking me for my phone number.  That should have been my first sign...LOL!

2.  One.  I am sure that all of you have heard this before.  For those of you that haven't, I will explain.  Instead of saying goodbye like the rest of the world, gangstas will say "ite, one".  (I still have zero clue why the "ite" always falls before the "one", but it does.)  After a few weeks, I just accepted "one" as a poor replacement to "goodbye", "peace out", or "lata".  The problem was, I was determined to become a gangsta connoisseur.  It look a lot of probing and pulling at these guys poor brains, but I later learned that "one" was a shorter way of saying "one love".  (This is where I gave up.  For the love of God, why would "one love" mean goodbye?!?!  And who is this one love?? Sigh...)

3.  Trill.  Sometimes a homie would say pretty powerful statements that would throw the whole crew off guard.  These deep rooted words of wisdom would leave the whole group dumb founded.  All they could ever manage to spill out of their mouths after an intelligent statement was "trill".  (I swear that I thought they were making a noise!  I thought it was some dumb noise like that Birdman call or something.)  Turns out they were actually responding with rational reply in their native toungue.  Trill means "true and real".

4.  Cracka Lackin.  Out of all the ridiculous terms that came out of these people's mouths, this one was by far the most annoying.  For weeks I thought it was a dumb song lyric or a famous quote that had no real meaning.  Turns out I was wrong.  (Did you ever see Finding Nemo?  Do you know the scene where the seagulls say "mine, mine, mine!"?  Well this is ten thousands times more annoying than even that!)  Cracka Lackin is the gangsta way of saying "cool".  This one never made sense to me either.  It is shorter and way less obnoxious just to say "cool" than it is to be cracka lackin every damn minute of the day!!!

That is where I end today's lesson.  My brain is swimming with all different forms of gangsta talk, so before I slip up and show you up with my hip use of modern slang, I'm going to end it here.  Ite, one!! 

-LMF

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Drum Roll Pleaseee

It is Sunday night and playtime is officially over.  My weekend was crazy.  First off, Happy Birthday to my Big Cousin <3.  She turned 26 years old today.  We celebrated Saturday night and had an amazing time.  It was a small gathering with our closest family members.  The star of the party was her 1 year old son my beautiful godson who kept us laughing all night long.  The poor baby discovered photo booth on my laptop and was quickly scarred for life with images of his distorted face.  My cousin and I both got slapped by our grandmother for traumatizing a little baby.  Who knew that would scare a child so much?  Guess we didn't think.  Sigh...  How was your weekend?


Within the past 2 days, I have spent time with 2 of my exes.  I saw MrBikeRide and The Swede.  The genius inside my head has been telling me to revisit all the men of my past.  Remember when the genius in my head told me to hang Britney Spears above my bed?  Sigh, you would think I learn...  The plan was going perfectly for a short while.

Seeing The Swede again reminded me that while he is sexy as hell, he suffers from severe boxer brain.  I have no patience for people that lack common sense.  He is one of them.  This became apparent when he looked over to my girlfriend and randomly asked her if she liked waffles.  Like, why?!?!?  He asked me to be his girlfriend again.  When I declined, he tried to bribe me with a trip to Barbados.  Poor guy...if only he shut his mouth and sat there looking pretty...  Bottom line:  I have no regrets ending things with The Swede.  


Seeing MrBikeRide again was like fireworks exploding in the sky.  He kissed me, and I melted.  He took me for a four hour motorcycle ride.  Bike rides are a huge turn on!  We spent the day joking around and acted as if we were picking up where we left off.  He dropped me off home giving me a quick kiss and informing me that he would call me as soon as he got home.  His green eyes get me every time!  Ever since I saw him he's been calling and texting saying how nice it was to see me and how great it was to spend time together again.  Bottom line:  I regret ending things with MrBikeRide.


The genius in my head told me that if I were to see the exes that occasionally cross my mind, then I would no longer think "what if".  It would be confirmed that the relationship ended for a reason and there should be no looking back.  Problem is, I opened up a door that I'm not sure should have been opened.  Well, I had 2 for 3.  That ain't so bad!  So I ask all of you, Did you ever feel obligated to confirm that an old relationship is really dead?

On a lighter note, here are the answers you have all been waiting for!!  Drum roll pleaseee!!!!


#1:  The lovely, Jennifer Anniston
#2:  The adorable, Puss in Boots
#3:  The legendary, Jack Nicholson
#4:  The sexy, Matthew Mcconaughey

-LMF

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Who Dat ?!

In honor of one of my friends, let's play a game!  This friend of mine happens to love guessing celebrity's body parts!  Not like that, get your head out of the gutter!!  I figured it would be fun to join in the game.  I mean, it is the weekend and you know what that means...playtime!  ;) 

I'm going to post four celebrity's pictures.  I cropped out these celebrities abs so you can all guess who they belong to.  (Why their abs?  Because who doesn't like to see a perfectly toned gut!)  Tomorrow I'll tune you all in to who they REALLY are.  Good luck!!

You're welcome gentlemen!  Hint:  If you knew her, she'd be one of your hottest friends.

You're welcome furry lovers!  Hint:  This is not some dude that needs a serious waxing.

Sorry folks!  Hint:  Don't get too mad at me for this.  Try some anger management!

You're welcome ladies!!  Hint:  I would NEVER try and lose this man.  Ever.
-LMF

Friday, November 18, 2011

A Very Snuggly Birthday Cupcake

Happy Friday everyone!!  How amazing does it feel that the weekend is finally HERE!  Woo hoo :)

New Obsession Alert:  Despite all of my free time being spent on schoolwork, I finally reached the very end of the book I was reading.  Sis gave me a book to check out and I agreed to read it.  A Piece of Cake by Cupcake Brown is by far one of the best books I have ever read.  That is saying a lot considering the amount of reading that I do!  This author's memoir inspired me to not only be a better person, but to appreciate everything the universe has graced me with.  Her heart wrenching story (I spent half of the novel with tears in my eyes!) made me want to be a better person, reconnected me with the universe's higher power, and encouraged me to work harder to achieve everything I desire to accomplish in life.  This book has LMF's seal of approval!
Don't let the sprinkles on the cover fool you!
I am about to share with you all something much more embarassing then the time I egged myself.  Sigh...no judging allowed!  Yesterday I was fiddling around with my Facebook when I noticed that it was a buddy's birthday.  The second I saw whose special day it was, embarrassing thoughts started to taunt my poor brain.  Happy Birthday Snug Jones!  Who is Snug Jones you ask?  No...he's not a rapper like Sis thought when she got her friend request... In order for you to fully grasp who or what Snug Jones is you're going to need a little background information.

Last year I held the prestigious position of selling washers.  (Not washing machines, but washers.  You know.  The little round things with the hole in the middle...oh shush, someones gotta do it!)  During that time I got some sort of freaky admirer that worked in "the back".  I'm not sure what he did back there, but what ever it was must have been important because he was there almost 24 hours a day!  (Don't jump in shock with this one!)  This guy was a stalker!!  We can refer to him as Fidget.  Fidget became infatuated with me.  He somehow found my phone number and would call/text all the time even after I asked him not to.  He then found me on Facebook where I denied his friend request.  When all else failed, I lied and told him that I had a boyfriend.  Who was my boyfriend?  Good question because I didn't even know yet!

In order to fully convince this psycho that I was in fact a taken woman, I needed to get into a Facebook relationship and fast!  Out of desperation (Don't make that face!  I'd like to see YOU get a boyfriend in less than 5 hours!) I decided to create a fake Facebook account and make myself be in a relationship with them.  I fiddled with the idea of finding a model.  Nah...not believeable.  I fiddled with the idea of asking biff.  That might send Facebook in a uprage that it FINALLY happened.  Then as I was sitting on my couch with a glass of wine and my computer, it struck me!

Who keeps me warm at night?  My snuggie.  Who hugs me when I'm lonley or upset?  My snuggie.  Who has spontaneous Britney Spears dance parties with me?  My Snuggie.  And finally...Who was I cuddling with at that exact moment?  My Snuggie. 

Yes ladies and gentlemen, I created a fake Facebook page and a fake Facebook relationship with my snuggie, aka Snug Jones.  I still don't know where I got the Jones from...  It was all downhill from there.  I filled out all of the info like a pro!  I mean, who knew my snuggie better then me?  Suddenly his hometown was Cleveland, he was proficient in Greek, and he was really into red heads.  Now all I needed was a picture.  Light bulb!  Since Snug Jones was a zebra print fabric, his picture would be a Zebra!  Then, to make it worse, any picture that he was laying in the background in he got tagged!  Soon I was adding all my closest friends this way he would appear to be a real person.  That was that.

I convinced Fidget that I was madly in love with a gorgeous man named Snug Jones that hailed from Cleveland and worked at the Bronx Zoo.

Have a great weekend everyone!!

-LMF

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Sexiest Men Alive: Revamped!!

Happy Hump Day everyone!  What a perfect day to create my own top ten list of the sexiest men alive....

Apparently People magazine doesn't really know what they are talking about when it comes to sexy men.  (From their choices I'm assuming its a bunch of old men in a room trying to figure out what makes a guy "hot".  Sigh...)  Their winner was Bradley Cooper.  He's average looking at best.  Cooper's runner up was Ryan Gosling.  I mean, he's cute, but would you really call him sexy?  I don't think so... I decided that I am clearly better suited to award the title "Sexiest Man Alive".  Lucky for all of you, I accept the job!

Let the LMF awards commence!  They are listed in ascending order from sexy to sexiest.  I wonder who the winner is going to be?! 
10.  Channing Tatum
Do I really need to say why?  Just look at those abs!!
9.  Matthew Fox
Because he made the idea of being stranded on island ok.  Swoon...
8.  Cam Newton
His football body is just amazing., plus he has the most adorable smile!
7.  Gerard Butler
Between his rock hard body, gorgeous eyes, and sexy accent how could he not be on my list?
6.  Chris Zylka
He is the mysterious, bad boy that lives next door.  I'd glady kick out my neighbors so he could move in!
5.  Maksim Chmerkovskiy
He is a jerk, but his cocky attitude just adds to his appeal.  Plus, look at that dancer bod!!
4.  Ian Somerhalder
His blue eyes kill me everytime.  Plus, he's a genuine person and dedicates his life to helping animals and the environment!
3.  Aaron Hernandez
Aside from his cinnamon colored skin, show stopping smile, and football player bod, he has the sexiest tatoos I've ever seen!
2.  Jared Padalecki
His body is perfection and he's been trained to kick serious ass.  What is there not to swoon over?
1.  Robert Downey Jr.
I'm not sure what it is about him, but he is the definition of sexy!!!

So how do you guys think I did?  I think I outdone myself!!  I know this is a whole lot of sexy to put on one page, but I knew you could all handle it.  Who would you put on your list?

-LMF

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Tag. Ur it!

Today I got tagged in some sort of fun blog tagging game.  Apparently I'm "it" and it's my turn to answer the questions.  Wi from A Single Girl's Musings tagged me despite her superstition of the number 4.  We all know how I feel about superstitions...sigh...knock knock  Ok, i've never done anything like this before so let's see how it goes...

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with four things per question. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

A) FOUR JOBS I'VE HAD IN MY LIFE:

1. A/R, Credit, & Collections in UHQ
2. Bank teller
3. Receptionist
4. Crew Trainer at McDonalds...for 5 years...hahaha 

B) FOUR MOVIES I WOULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AND OVER:

1. Dirty Dancing
2. Grease  John Travolta.  Yum!
3. Walk the Line
4. Aladin Don't judge!

C) FOUR PLACES WHERE I HAVE LIVED:

1. Long Island, NY
2. I lived in Greece for a summer once...does that count?
3. 
4. 

D) FOUR TV SHOWS I LOVE TO WATCH:

1. Vampire Diaries
2. The Secret Circle
3. Glee
4. Once Upon a Time <-- did you watch it yet?  hmm!?

E) FOUR PLACES I HAVE BEEN ON VACATION:

1. Boston  I love it here.  I would move there if an opportunity arose!
2. Miami, Florida
3. Williamsburg, Virginia
4. Cleveland, Ohio

F) FOUR WEBSITES I VISIT DAILY:

1. Blogger 
2. Facebook
3. Twitter
4. Perezhilton.com  I said, don't judge! lol

G) FOUR OF MY FAVORITE FOODS:

1. Eggplant Parm
2. Spaghetti
3. Butternut Squash Soup
4. Pizza

H) FOUR PLACES I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW:

1. Europe!!  Preferably on some romantic getaway with a man that speaks with a hot accent!
2. California 
3. Boston reliving the college life with my cousin!
4. Right where I am.  I'm very cozy right now.  So... I'm wearing my Snuggie!

I) FOUR OF MY FAVORITE PERFUMES/ COLOGNES

1. Outspoke by Fergie It's sexy!!!
2. Tommy Girl 
3. Ralph Lauren Romance
4. Victoria's Secret Love Spell

J) FOUR OF MY FAVORITE MUSICALS

1. The Drowsy Chaperone I'm not a huge fan of broadway, but this show was hysterical.  I highly recommend it!
2. The Beauty and the Beast
3. Moulin Rouge
4. Grease

K) FOUR FAMOUS PEOPLE I WOULD LOVE TO MEET - DEAD OR ALIVE :

1. Robert Downey Jr !!!!!!
2. Britney Spears
3. Marilyn Monroe
4. Chris Zylka

L) FOUR THINGS THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY:

1. My Godson  I love my baby boy.
2. Meeting new & interesting people
3. New shoes!  Especially Betsy Johnsons!
4. Ben & Jerry's Double Fudge Brownie ice cream

N) FOUR PEOPLE THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY:

1. My godson
2. My entire crazy family!
3. Biff, Sis, DramaQueen and all my other friends :)
4. YOU!!!  Duh!  Like you even needed me to tell you that!

Thank you Wi for tagging me in your post.  I feel honored that you wish to get to know me better.  Hopefully my answers are exciting enough for you!  Now, I'm sick of talking about myself.  Tell me about you!  Please :)

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